Natalie Zed: Defying Gravity

Friday, December 05, 2008

Proof that I am Profoundly Broken, Thursday Edition.

Part 1: At the Toronto One of a Kind Show with Gennie C, Bill K and Lily the Pirate.

We passed a stall labeled Abel's Canes, which featured a wide away of canes, walking sticks, and other ambulatory aids.
Me: *pointing at one* Wow, that would hurt.
Gennie, LTP and Bill: *blank*
Gennie: *moving from blankness to shock* You mean...if you were beaten with it??!!
Me: Well, yes. What else would you use a cane for?
Gennie, LTP and Bill: *expressions of total horror*
Me: Oh. Oh! For walking. Right.

Later, I was perusing a very cool indie jewelry booth.
Me: Can I see that heart pendant?
Sales Rep: Sure. *reaches for a pretty heart pendant with a pearl set in it*
Me: No, the other heart pendant. The one shaped like a real heart.
Sales Rep: The one shaped like the real organ. With the rivets.
Me: Yeah, the cool Ugly Heart.
Sales Rep: ...okay.
Me: The aorta is really well done. I'll take it.
Sales rep: ...

Part 2: While watching Joel Schumacher's The Phantom of the Opera with Lily the Pirate and a.raw.


Me: Wow, he really just grabbed her throat right there.
*pause*
That's alright.
a.raw and LTP: *horrified laughter*

a.raw: The Phantom is so much sexier than Raoul.
Me: Damn straight.
a.raw: The mask only makes him sexier.
Me: And the cape. And the gloves. Can't forget the gloves.
a.raw: He is totally about to take advantage of Christine.
Me: He can take advantage of me anytime he wants. Especially if he leaves the mask, cape, and gloves on.
a.raw: Heh. Can you imagine having sex with a guy wearing only a mask, cape and gloves?
Me: YES. YES I CAN.

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Natalie Zed updated @ 7:23 PM!!