Natalie Zed: Defying Gravity

Friday, July 18, 2008

Dark Night

14. On one blanket and under another in High Park. The quality of light sinks away. The smell of incense, pot, chocolate chip cookies, greenery, dirt, skin. pebbles and grass through the blanket. eyelids over corneas, eyelashes resting on cheeks. slow breathing. someone at a microphone and listen. listen. eyes slid.

15. the train is one swaying nervous hum. trying to sleep through the numbness. there is cream cheese smeared on a gray duffle bag. across the aisle: she in blond and tanned, gesturing with an iphone, her sunglasses reflective as a Louisiana cop's. Telling the older woman next to her about her early period, hormones in the beef. I keep very still, hope no one notices I am spreading like an oil slick, leaking everywhere, getting into everything. hazmat.

16. something obey me. electron, electrolyte, cabling, crux, helpdesk, highspeed, something. please.

17. I just brought chips; I didn't know UZIs were an option. face cut into shape, a mass of stringyness and smears, just enough of the carnival to be menacing and I think yeah. my face has been caught in that rat trap. cut into a smile. snapped into place by cellphones, paparazzi without the flash. sugar builds bridges and skyscrapers on my teeth. the theatre is one giant mouth. breathing. abject.

18. sick cat on the porch, fireflies from blade to brush. chirps, eerie laps, a bonfire smell, gravel crunch. circle of milky tea. my skin is angry, red bubbles break the surface. soon I will be liquified. drink.

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Natalie Zed updated @ 10:20 p.m.!!