Natalie Zed: Defying Gravity

Friday, October 14, 2005

In Prof. X's class this week, we discussed the construction of identity through positions and consumption patterns within a capitalist socio-economic context. In other words, how you are the brands you buy. This got me thinking about how our Evil Ant Overlords see me, how the schematic of me looks if it is defined via the money I spend, the stuff I buy all the time. Tjis naturally interesteced with the whole "you are what you eat" idiom, and made me take a close look at things I regularly buy and consume -- in the most literal sense. So here is Natalie Zed Product Placement #1: edible edition.

Tim Horton's Extra Large Steeped Tea and a blueberry muffin or cheese croissant. Provides caffeine and just enough carbs to keep me from getting the shakes when I inevitably forget to eat til late evening.

Noodle Express Special #2. Charred chicken, rice vermicelli, shredded cucumber and carrot, peanuts, fish sauce. It is simple, costs about $4, and gives my tummy joy.

Orange and banana smoothie -- from Jugo Juice or Booster Juice if I can, though Orange Julius will do in a pinch. Bananas go with everything -- especially peanut butter. Mmm. peanut butter.

Kraft Crunky peanut butter. It's not as oily as sugary as most, I find, and therefore more suited to being eaten directly out of the container with a spoon, a finger, or celery sticks.

Coke. So versatile. So caffeinated. So much sugar. For the most part, I've stopped calling it Coke. I just say I am picking up some mix.

Triscuits. I don't snack over much (aside from on The Sabbath. something about video games and D&D makes me want to put salty crunchy things compulsively in my mouth), but when I just need to crunch on something, nothing goes better with apples and cheese than triscuits. Together, they form the Holy Snack Triumvirate.

Yorkshire Gold irish breakfast tea. Yes, more tea. Steeped for more than 45 seconds, this stuff is strong enough to dissovle driveways stains, yet has almost no aftertaste, beign the good stuff. It even keeps me awake sometimes.

English muffins. The perfect vehicle for Craving Sandwiches of all descriptions, they also make scambled eggs edible so long as ketchup and a cheese slice can be procured.

Ichiban ramen noodles. At $.90 a pop, they're a bit upscale for ramen, but their plump noodliness is worth the extra few cents. Never make a student stir-fry without them.

Crispix. The cereal equivalent of triscuits.

Malibu Rum and Canadian Club. I prefer whiskey in the evening, whereas the coconut rum is more suited to Girly Emergency Afternoon drinks.

Michelina's alfredo lasagna with broccoli. The one and only frozen meal I will eat. I keep a few for those moments whe its either eat in five minutes or less, or I start gnawing on my own fingers.

Sour cream and onion pringles. I rarely buy them, because I will eat and entire tube. And I mean that.

Maple Leaf Lazy Maple bacon. whether its for blts or breakfast, I never make less than an entire pack at a time, and somehow there are never leftovers.

Minute Maid pulp free and extra calcium orange juice. Bought for their use as an essential smoothy ingredient, and also because OJ goes so darn well with vodka.

Liberty Mediterranean plain yogurt. The full fat stuff. So thick, so glorious, such an essential additive to so maky baked goods. Same goes for the 14% sour cream.

Sammareli olive oil. It's Good Olive Oil, not Very Good, but reasonable enough to use daily and not have to make e.v.o.o. a separate line on the budget.

Kraft dinner. Yes, I know. It's still damn good. Shut up.

Other than that, It's all fresh stuff, really. Chicken breasts, cheddar cheese, eggs, beef, fruits and veggies, spices -- things which fill the majority of my grocery kart, and are selected purely on the basis of freshness, attrativeness, on-sale-ness, or how well it will bake in a pie. Take heed, Marketing demons. There are huge gaps here you seem to have missed. Keep your betty crocker and duncan hines and peak freens. I'll bake my own.
Natalie Zed updated @ 12:40 p.m.!!